Talked with Kelvin about some stuff last night.
I still don't understand, and am still confused.
I've drifted far, and can't seem to return.
After talking though, I feel scared...

I don't blame God for anything.
Merely myself, for being who I am.
To live a lie is painful.
But is my truth 'the truth'?
And is my lie a lie?

I'm very confused, and can't find solace.
I'm afraid and insecure.
To go on as I am, or to change?
I'm a creature of convenience.
That's what I am.

To have no freewill seems good.
Yet I'd be a human puppet.
With no soul, no substance.
To be free of restrictions,
or to be restrained but saved?